That policy's gotta work for something.If anyone predicted that the Day 1a turnout for the Mid-States Poker Tour $1,110 Michigan State Poker Championship at Firekeepers Casino in Battle Creek, Michigan was going to compete with the record-setting Day 1a field set back in May, they were right.

But your actual mission is to stand at this privately-donated chair - which does not exist, do you understand me? - and do the only thing you're good at.ĬAPTAIN: Don't ask, don't tell. Strickland wants an elf in the picture, and the Arlen midget spends his winters in Florida.ĬAPTAIN: Okay, who here knows how to cut hair?ĬAPTAIN: Dauterive, your records have been doctored to show you as a master electrician with a security clearance for pinball repair. PEGGY: Because of your hair? But Christmas is eight months away! HANK: I'm out of the Strickland Propane Christmas card. Now Bill has no purpose in the army either! A petition to reinstate has been filed, but that could take twenty years.ĭALE: You eliminated Bill! Bill-iminator!ĭALE: The army eliminated the Sergeant barbers. It's the Ricky Martin influence.ĬAPTAIN: This base is disbanding the barber unit. I'd go see him in person, but no self-respecting bus company would let me on with hair like this.īILL: I hear they're wearing it short in Guantanamo this summer. It would ban flag-burning in all.' Aw, he never even read it. That's why Jim Powell has introduced House Resolution number 11461. HANK (reading the reply from his Congressman): 'Representative Jim Powell thinks your problem and flag-burning are among the biggest problems facing America today. You can't do it.ĭALE: Even Bill Clinton only spends $300 on his haircuts, and for that he gets the haircut plus a high-colonic administered by Barbra Streisand.īILL: Well, I guess I should have offered.īILL: Hank, you can't fight the Army without declaring war.ĭALE: Maybe if you had the Marines on your side. (beat) Well, you try getting a B-2 bomber for 1.3 billion. LIEUTENANT: Look, I know the chair's too much at $80,000, but then they give us a B-2 bomber for 1.3 billion. And I hate Saddam Hussein! I like his haircut, but that's it. HANK: Wasting all that money is like buying a haircut for Saddam Hussein. It's a damn good chair, but I'm not gonna spend $110,000 for a barber chair. The French make a barber chair that costs $110,000. We spend $80,000 for each military-grade barber chair. Hill, but that is how much it costs the Army to give someone a haircut. LIEUTENANT: I wish this bill were a mistake, Mr. Seems like there's a story there, but you never shared it with me, but that's okay, 'cause you might think I'm a gossip, and I probably am, but how the hell would you know if I'm not a good barber? Worry about those too much and you hit that scar over your left ear. Believe me, it's not easy being my barber.īILL: I know that! You've got those big thick neck muscles that knot up when you're tense, leaving that deep, deep valley, and then the northern ridge runs almost transverse to the crown. But your son's a jackass.īILL: Hank, I never cut civilian hair, but I've been looking at your head a long time. I can't deal with the jackasses any more. YOUNG HANK (getting a haircut from Cotton): I think you cut my ear.ĬOTTON: I think you cry more than the guy I killed out from under that helmet! Used to see it more: Claude Akins, Ross Martin, Robert Stack, James McArthur on the third season of 5-0.

I find it unsubtle, but it's a way to go. He feathered in the back where he usually tapers. JACK: So what'll it be? The Roger Staubach or the Rookie Roger Staubach?īILL: Hey, Hank, what'd you do to your hair?īILL: Oh my, yes. The King of the Hill Quotes Page: 'Hank's Bad Hair Day'Ĭlick here to return to the Main Quotes Page King of the Hill Quotes: 'Hank's Bad Hair Day' 'Now Bill has no purpose in the army either.'

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